Battle of Broxtowe Part 2, and some self congratulation.

More politics I’m afraid, but since no one else seems to be writing about the Battle for Broxtowe, I will try and fill that niche.( edit: I’ve since been pointed towards this rather excellent slice of commentary that you should have a look at, its a hell of a lot more professional than my witterings: )  I’ll save any other nuggets of Beestonian weirdness till after the election, where you might need as much light relief as possible, if Cameron becomes PM. He’ll probably repay Murdoch’s favours of Sun /NOTW support by blowing up the BBC and making everyone swap their Facebook accounts for MySpace ones (a Murdoch owned company).

So news. And not that good. I was hoping that we might have got away with out any outright fascists throwing their hat into the ring, but alas, here comes Michael Shore. Say hello Michael, the latest BNP twot to try and stake a claim in Beeston/Broxtowe.

A brief history of the BNP in Broxtowe: Sadie Graham was narrowly elected to the council a few years back by the residents of Brinsley, attended very few council meetings then went very strange…she split from the BNP criticizing Nick Griffen and setting up a blog attacking him, had her husband leak the membership list to the press (she was accused, but charges dropped) and did what is customary amongst the far-right when they grasp a bit of power -let the aggression and frustration of having to suppress their true natures behind a veneer of respectability flood out.

Sadly, the BNP take away votes more rapaciously from the left than the right:

Of course, you wont see them round Beestonia. Here is an exemplary example of a well integrated community, the numerous shops and restaurants that provide such variety to the high street testament to this. Come to a town that actually has a diverse racial and ethnic population is not a strategy the BNP dabble in, instead they go to places such as the Amber Valley and Brinsley, both homogeneously white areas, and tell scary tales about the evil Kurds, Kosovans, blacks, Asians, Lefties etc in a method that served so well for the ruling party in Germany in 1936.

I wont go on about a polemic about the evils of the BNP, as I have planned to spend the rest of the afternoon shooting some bucket-based fish.


The Green Party Join the Fray

A more warm welcome to the battle to the Green Party, and their representative David Mitchell. Presumably hes at a bit of a loose end, and must fill in that time between appearing on every tv panel show going, hosting his own radio 4 quiz, writing a column for the Observer and doing Peep Show and his sketch show. Mind you, as the chances of the Greens getting in are the same as a polar bell in hell, he won’t be giving up his day jobs soon.

It might actually be a different David Mitchell.  I’ll google, one moment.

Ah, I’m sorry. My journalistic nous is flawed. Hes actually a Beestonian and a governor at Roundhill, not the ubiquitous Lidl-Stephen Fry.

I feel sorry for the Greens. As we approach enviro-geddon, the ice caps and glaciers disappearing and the planet threatening to turn into the New Mars,  the Greens should be taking in voters as fast as the ark took in braces of animals when they last had an issue with rising sea-levels. But no. They have slipped away, marginalised a few years ago by Dave ‘vote Blue, get Green’ Cameron and his lovely, chauffeur-followed bicycle, and his relaunch of the Tories as the saviours of the environment. This has been shown to be bogus, the only examples of green practices being chimney-wisteria control, clean moats for all and luxury housing for ducks.

Beestonia has, or rather had, as from today Nick Palmer stood down as MP pending the public vote, an MP with good green credentials. Opposition to building on Green-Belt, and the pro-active tackling of the deforestation of Toton sidings by a dodgy extraction outfit, amongst other notable interventions, mean that we do/did have a green with a small g MP. If you do fancy giving the Green Party a vote, wait until local/European elections, when your vote will actually mean something, rather than wasting valuable, possibly not-recycledpaper on a vote on May 6th.


As mentioned above,  I seem to be the only person writing exclusively about the Battle for Broxtowe, I’m duty-bound to attend the various debates cracking off round Beeston. I urge you to also attend, and see the candidates in the flesh:

  • 15th April Nottingham Evening Post event, Roundhill School, Foster Avenue, Beeston, 7.30pm
  • 20th April Beeston Express event, College House School, Chilwell, 7.30pm.25th April Hope NG9 churches event, Beeston Baptist Church, Dovecote Lane, 7.30pm• 29th April Anglican event, Bramcote Parish Church, 7.30pm

Any of the many Beestonians who live outside Broxtowe, apologies for the focus on what must be a dull subject to read about. The same applies to Beestonians who live inside Broxtowe. Sorry, Ill write about stuff soon in the traditional manner: poorly, drunkenly and about subjects less insomnia-conquering.


If any of the candidates wish to contact me for right of reply/ info, or anyone from the National Press wish to save time surfing Wikipedia before they come here to report on this key marginal, or you fancy sending me some links to funny clips of ducks on skateboards, you can get me directly at, or by ringing my PA  , who by a weird coincidence is also called Matt Goold and sounds just like me,on 07595954622.


One more thing: I recently went past 10,000 hits here, which is fairly stunning in my head, seeing as I only set this place up out of sheer boredom and finding it a more effective conduit for my mind-slop than babbling in The Crown/ The Bean to disinterested parties. Although about 75% of these hits were probably from the tale of Teresa Lou (now in its own dedicated site: ) , but all the same, I am celebrating by having my head grafted onto the Beeman for a month.