Well, nearly 5, as I have only just round to sitting down to getting this stuff on line. It’ll probably be 5 DAYS TO GO when you read this, but hey! You’re not pedants out there, are you?

Or are you? If so, and especially if you are DRIVEN UTTERLY CRAZY by INAPPROPRIATE APOSTROPHES and annaGRATUITOUS USE OF CAPITALISATION FOR EMPHASIS then the following might make your teeth itch. I myself would be a hypocrite to take this too seriously, as my repeated crime of mistaking ‘its’ and ‘it’s’ causes friends and colleagues to cry with despair. But if you’re writing a about education a the time, and how great you’ve made it, perhaps avoid publishing it and sticking it in thousands of Broxtowe letterboxes (ta for tip: @_SCHou_ ):


In other ‘there must be an election on’ news, a bizarre tweet from El Soubz:


Now, I know Anna is desperate and flailing, so recourse to trying to stir up faux-outrage for, errrr, a conversation between a married couple is huge desperation, and utterly bizarre. Is he bugging family bedrooms? If I tell my wife tonight that I don’t want to live in a Persimmon house due to the connection Soubry has with them (and the fact they have a pretty bad record of shonkiness), will I be in her next tweet ‘OMG BEESTON #LEFTIESCUM BOYCOTTING FINE UK HOUSEBUILDING INDUSTRY #HATESHOUSEZ #SCUM’? Beestonians: tonight, careful with that pillow talk. Big Soubz is listening.


Had an hour to kill yesterday. So I did this. I cannot wait till the election is over and I can get back to proper time-killers, SOUBRY DOLElike staring into space; trying to freak out my cats by playing them cat videos; or merely trying to make anagrams of Iain Duncan Smith. Which is fun even when it’s not election season. Go on. Try one. I know you will. Do it.

(If the art department at Saatchi and Saatchi are reading – hi guys! -I am free Thursdays to help out round the office, ok?)


….And Finally: Some Feel Good News.

A couple of days ago I put up a story about a guy boasting about nearly reducing an ‘very frail lady’ to tears. Tory candidates and nincompoops Adam Stockwell and Ross Bell; as well as Broxtowe Conservative activist Sally Brierly all thought this was hilarious, liking the post and the image it conjured.

There has been a rather lovely development, however, with a rather different story emerging.

The canvasser in question, a long term activist by the name of Alison Ramsey was out canvassing with three others, when they came to the guys house. There was a frank discussion, albeit rather one sided

He spoke non-stop for about 3 minutes before closing his door.  He was polite, and far from being aggressive, he apologised more than once for talking to me about a problem that he recognised was outside my control.
The only complaint I have about this gentleman’s behaviour was that he did not let me get a word in edgeways.
…but no actual tears, or anything close to. Nick Palmer, on hearing the story, figured out the people involved and got them to chat over email, where they both got on seemingly well -with differences on issues, obviously, but really well. Mr Hardy explained:
I have a lot to learn in writing my thoughts and I often revert to generalisation. ( a million miles away ) would cover any distance for example. I did originally think that I may have upset you and I am very relieved that those thoughts were unfounded. I wish you every success for he future and if you ever canvass me again please come in for a cup of tea or coffee. We don’t bite, honest.!!
Which I think is rather lovely, and all credit to Mr Hardy for writing to  Ms. Ramsey.
This is really how politics should be conducted: discussion, rationality, and debate; not the division and anger Soubry preaches, heckled on by the likes of Ross Bell, Adam Stockwell et al.
Whoever gets in next week: more or this please, less of the ranty nastiness. Beeston deserves better.